What if...

 

What if…….

You know, I have been thinking long and hard after my last murmuring and I don’t want people thinking ‘oh what a shame’ or that I’m having a pity party. Quite the opposite is happening to be honest.

God in His graceful heart has really been speaking to me about facing forward and looking ahead. I have forgiven and been forgiven and now raring to go. Still there is the question of WHAT IF….

It is one of the biggest questions we ask ourselves in life.

What if I am not in the right relationship/job/place to stay and so many other what ifs out there that sometimes the fear of the future can lead to stopping us moving forward at all.

What if I….make the same mistakes again, fall, fail, trust and get hurt again. All these things can happen and as people who have a heart it’s so easy for it to be broken and misused/abused, stricken.

For me its more a fear of: what if I fail my marriage, my ministry or (GULP) My God. I do not want to let Jesus down see and sometimes that fear can be a hindrance to us fulfilling our place in the world. I know I have failed Him before. I have fallen in ministry and NO by God’s good grace my marriage is awesome. But I have let Him down, I have shouted at Him, I have blamed Him, swore at Him, even sat in a field screaming at Him with all my pain and hurt (GOD ITS YOUR FAULT).

Yet, out of it all I have found that no matter what, everything I have said and done, right or wrong, has been laid bear at the foot of the cross of Jesus. See, Jesus knew I was going to do these things, He knew I was going to be an accuser, a slanderer, a hater of others, Himself and His Father. He knew and knows I fail at in things in life, ministry, work, friendships/relationships. Yet He carries me through it all. He DIED for these things to set me free at the cross.

No, that doesn’t mean I can run around like a crazy idiot doing what I want all the time regardless of the impact of my actions. But what it does mean that I have the freedom to turn to Him in my hours of need and leave the what ifs with Him and in His hands. Knowing that no matter the failures, He is there for me. And knowing this gives me the strength to not fail as much when I keep giving Him my issues, my failures, my what ifs…..

So here’s a thought I had. The other day while in the car I realised that if Jesus would for one second remove His presence from my life, I would fail. I would fall into sin, into rebellion, into hatred. But He does not do that, He completely loves me in His very being. His love for me (and you) was and is accomplished and made complete on that cross.

So, whatever your what ifs today, put them in His hands while keeping your eyes on Him. I have…

What if i stumble song